In the words of poet Ada Limon; “[we] can’t help it, [we] love the way men love”! In honour of Men’s issue (what, like they only have one??), Craccum celebrates the unique ways in which the men of UoA show love to their partners, friends and family.
In 1890, a nurse (soon to be Mrs. Halsted), told Dr. William Halsted that the strong antiseptic used in the surgery room burned her skin. He invented rubber gloves, not to protect patients from infection, but to keep her hands safe. The goldfish cracker was invented by Oscar Kambly in 1985, not for profit, but to celebrate his wife on her birthday (she was a Pisces!!) Wordle was created for Josh Wardle’s partner because she loved word games and he didn’t want her to be bored during the COVID lockdown. Interviewing UoA’s finest (and inadvertently ruining some relationships in the journalistic process), I asked you guys how the men in your lives show you love. The results are in; for every Tinder dude who “hates starsign chicks” there is one who will make you a cheerful fish-shaped snack—just because you’re a Pisces!
Boyfriends of UoA Rise Up
“I’m doing a balancing act with a stack of fresh fruit in my basket. I love you. I want us both to eat well” -Christopher Citro
Rachael (23, BA/LLB): “My boyfriend keeps my favourite fruit in the fridge whenever it’s in season. He always lets me have the most crispy chips.”
Liz (24, BA/LLB): “I mentioned on the second date that I was a light sleeper, easily startled awake by small sounds. My partner told me later that he bought snoring tape on the way home. He practised sleeping with it over his mouth because he didn’t want to wake me up in case he ever spent the night”.
Hayden (22, Bcom): “My boyfriend always packs a spare phone charger for me when we travel because he knows I’ll forget mine. Once I caught him watching YouTube videos on how to wrap presents so he could give me a wrapped Christmas present—I’m a hoe for that man!”. (Note to self: well-wrapped gifts get you ho, ho, hoes)
Hayley (23, BA): “On a particularly rainy and cold night we ordered Maccas. Attempting to satisfy a PMS craving, I couldn’t wait to dig into my Big Mac combo with no sesame seeds. But when our order arrived my worst fears were realised, I was given seeds! So amidst sniffles and tears my boyfriend picked off every single sesame seed. He can give me his (sesame) seed any day.”
In my DILF era
“My dad once confessed to me that he became a shoemaker because they buried my grandma shoeless. I can’t help it, I love the way that men love” – Ada Limon
Liam (20, BCom): “Dad never lets mum chop onions. He knows she hates to do it. She hasn’t chopped an onion since they started dating 23 years ago.”
Nelson (23, BE/Bcom): “My dad cried when I told him how my ex treated me during our relationship. I’ve been trying to date kinder people because I know that anyone who hurts me will also hurt him”.
“Of each other, we should be kind. While there is still time” – Philip Larkin
Michelle (21, BA): “Anytime it’s dark, my friend Josh insists on walking me to my bus stop—even though it is 15 minutes away from his own, and in the complete opposite direction.”
Abby (23, BSc/Bcom): “My younger brother is 4 years old and watches K-dramas with me for hours. Because he’s too young to read the subtitles I asked him one day what he likes about them. He told me he ‘just likes to sit next to me on the couch.’
There was once a very great surgeon named Halsted. He loved a nurse immeasurably. One day Halsted noticed that her hands were chapped and red from assisting in surgery. And so he invented rubber gloves. For her. It is one of the great love stories in medicine. The difference between inspired medicine and uninspired medicine is love. When I met Ana I knew; I loved her to the point of invention”. -Sarah Ruhl, The Clean House