Are you a fan of Pop music but sick of hearing Camila and Shawn whine over each other? Do you not have that yummy yummy? Do you love Billie, but in deep with industry plant conspiracy theories? Where is Lorde’s third album? Samantha Putt (who told me she was blocked by Taylor swift in 2014) brings you a starter pack of pop music that does not include that insufferable Dance Monkey song:
Carly Rae Jepsen
Recommended if you like to wax poetry about tinder fuckboys on your finsta (they’re not gonna text you back). Rupi Kaur has got nothing on you.
Essential Tracks: Run Away With Me, Want You In My Room, Cut To The Feeling, Body Language, Boy Problems.
Recommended if you’re nostalgic for making dance routines with your cousins in 2006. Or blaring big rainbow energy from your car as you pull into the mall parking lot. Ciao x
Essential Tracks: Alterlife, Cherry, Cyber Stockholm Syndrome, Comme Des Garcons (Like The Boys), Take Me As I Am.
Christine and the Queens
Recommended if you don’t enunciate your words and people are always like ‘huh?’ when you speak. Very french, very chic, very nu.
Essential Tracks: Girlfriend, Gone, People (I’ve been Sad), Tilted, The Walker.
Recommended if you’ve daydreamed about winning American Idol. (Lifestyle editor note: I distinctly remember Sam telling me to stay for Mahalia, however I fucked up and my dumb high ass ended up amongst tik tockers at Benee. god i wished i stayed for Mahalia.)
Essential Tracks: I Wish I Missed My Ex, 17, Simmer, Do Not Disturb, Sober.
Recommended if you regularly disassociate and stare into the void at house parties. Sometimes the void screams back. Sometimes… it’s just your heart breaking.
Essential Tracks: Your Best American Girl, Strawberry Blonde, Pink in the Night, Nobody, I Bet on Losing Dogs.
Recommended if you want to carbonate weed butter while wearing lingerie/ silk boxer shorts. Doesn’t matter if it’s from Kmart or Lonely Lingerie. As long as it’s Black. You sexy motherfucker.
Essential Tracks: A Pale, Yo x Ti Tu x Mi, Brillo, Aute Cuture, Malamente.
Recommended if you have seriously considered buying black mesh pants. Charli loves to fucking party and so do you. Just pretend Fancy didn’t happen, it’s better for us all.
Essential Tracks: Vroom Vroom, Unlock It, Blame It On Your Love, Boys, Girls Night Out
Recommended if you have bleached your hair in the bathroom at 2am on a Tuesday night. Yes, I know she was the New Rules girl but this album circle she has been standing on my neck! Bring back disco already, Dua!
Essential Tracks: Future Nostalgia, Physical, Don’t Start Now, Electricity, Be the One.
Recommended if you’ve ever tried to replicate a twerking tutorial alone in your room. But more importantly, if you’ve tried and failed, and are looking for a subsequent confidence boost.
Essential Tracks: Juice, Phone, Tempo, Pants vs Dress, Boys
Recommended if you’ve done acid once but won’t shut the fuck up about it. This was Prince’s final contribution to music as a producer, so you can pretend to listen to him also.
Essential Tracks: Take a Byte, Tightrope, Pynk, Make Me Feel, Venus Fly.
Scan the code below to be linked to the playlist- go forth and never give Adam Levine another cent!